Once more unto the inbox, friends. Normally the “Press Release of the Day” feature is intended to mock the sender of said press release. Today is different. I’m not being sarcastic when I say that this press release is a gem. The product is interesting. The writing is stellar. The actual concept of the pitch in the press release is smart. It’s a good thing that more marketers don’t know how to do this, because otherwise I’d sit around and read press releases all day. I’m going to give you the entire thing, links and all, because SwampButt Underwear earned every word:
LAKE JACKSON, Texas, Aug. 24, 2026 — The start of school earlier in August signals the unofficial end of summer—or does it? Is “back to school” a reason to lower the shutters, retreat indoors and surrender the remaining weeks of sunshine? “No,” declares SwampButt Underwear corporate spokesman and guy who is always the last to leave, Nick Heraldson.
“In Southeast Texas and throughout much of the United States, it is still sunny, hot and unmistakably summer,” Heraldson said. “That someone else with school-age children has to shut down the family fun does not mean the rest of us should.”
SwampButt Underwear proposes that the period between the start of school and the arrival of genuinely cooler weather be officially recognized as “grown-up summer.”
It is prime time for adults whose travel schedules are not governed by school calendars. Vacationers, retirees, empty nesters, couples without children, remote workers and other flexible fun seekers can enjoy many popular destinations with shorter lines, less congestion and fewer encounters with the strollers, diaper bags, overtired children and equally exhausted parents that accompany peak family-travel season.
“School starting is like a jailbreak for people like me who are blessed with zero children,” Heraldson said. “The weather is still hot, the pools still have water in them and the bartenders are reporting for duty.”
BUT ISN’T EVERYTHING FOR SUMMER CLOSED?
The short answer is no. The longer answer is some municipal pools and locally operated recreation facilities close or reduce their hours when school resumes. Most major vacation destinations, however, do not organize their entire operating year around the local school calendar.
Beaches do not close when the first school bell rings. Neither do most resorts, amusement parks, national and state parks, golf courses, campgrounds, museums, cruise terminals or outdoor recreation destinations. Fish continue to bite and outdoor cooking of said fish is delightful.
Along the upper Texas Gulf Coast, Galveston offers 32 miles of shoreline, with Gulf waters typically remaining warm through October. Moody Gardens, the Galveston Island Historic Pleasure Pier, Kemah Boardwalk and Space Center Houston all continue operating after area schools reopen, although some attractions shift to shorter weekday or weekend schedules.
Kemah Boardwalk’s 2026 calendar, for example, includes a Labor Day weekend ride pass, an end-of-summer fireworks celebration Sept. 6 and a tequila-and-tacos festival Sept. 19.
The same principle applies nationally. Walt Disney World’s 2026 summer programming continues through Sept. 8. EPCOT’s International Food & Wine Festival begins Aug. 27 and continues through Nov. 21, demonstrating that some destination programming begins—not ends—after students return to class.
National and state parks also remain available for hiking, camping, fishing, paddling, wildlife watching and sightseeing well beyond the unofficial end of summer. Individual roads, campgrounds, concessions and visitor services may operate on reduced seasonal schedules. “Back to school changes who is standing in line and how long that line may be,” Heraldson said. “It does not change the weather, close the beach or drain the hotel swimming pool.”
SUMMER WEATHER DOESN’T READ THE SCHOOL CALENDAR
The calendar may say back to school, but the thermometer frequently says otherwise.
Across much of the South, late August and September can deliver the same combination of sunshine, heat and humidity experienced during June and July. Those conditions keep beaches, pools, golf courses, tennis courts, campgrounds, hiking trails, amusement parks and outdoor festivals firmly in play.
They can also produce perspiration, damp clothing and the uncomfortable condition from which SwampButt Underwear takes its name.
“Grown-up summer still requires grown-up preparation,” Heraldson said. “Check the weather, stay hydrated, use sunscreen, dress for the heat and wear underwear designed to help manage the consequences of having entirely too much fun outside.” Heraldson also mentioned the brand new ‘SwampButt Underwear Scale of Sultry’ online calculator that provides a complete, accurate forecast of the weather inside pants and how sweaty that forecast is. The free Scale of Sultry, a web-based weather calculator that uses temperature, humidity, solar exposure and fabric-drying characteristics to forecast how conducive current conditions are to visible perspiration and the dreaded swamp butt.
Travelers can consult the Scale of Sultry before heading to the beach, golf course, campground, amusement park or other grown-up summer destination.
SwampButt Underwear produces moisture-managing men’s underwear intended for hot weather, outdoor activity, travel and other situations in which ordinary underwear can become uncomfortably damp.
HOW TO OBSERVE GROWN-UP SUMMER
SwampButt Underwear recommends:
- Visiting beaches and waterfront destinations after the peak family-vacation period.
- Planning weekday visits when attractions are open and crowds lighter.
- Taking advantage of late-summer festivals, concerts and food-and-wine events.
- Scheduling golf, tennis, hiking and other strenuous activities during cooler morning or evening hours.
- Checking operating calendars because some seasonal attractions adopt reduced hours after mid-August.
- Monitoring local weather and heat advisories before outdoor activities.
- Carrying water, sunscreen and a change of clothes.
- Wearing lightweight, moisture-managing clothing suitable for the heat.
“Reduced hours do not mean reduced fun,” Heraldson said. “They simply mean you should check the website before driving three hours in flip-flops.”
For adults no longer tethered to a school calendar—or fortunate enough never to have been tethered to one—the opening of school is not the end of summer. It is the moment summer becomes quieter, less crowded and considerably more adult. “Let the children have their pencils, notebooks and color-coded folders,” Heraldson said. “The rest of us still have several perfectly good weeks of sunshine to misuse.”
When asked about adults who were school teachers, coaches and/or administrators not able to participate in ‘grown up summer’ Heraldson replied, “ the rest of us should not feel badly or have sympathy for those who made such poor career choices, especially when the pool is open.”
ABOUT SWAMPBUTT UNDERWEAR
SwampButt Underwear is a Texas-based men’s underwear brand created to help men remain more comfortable during hot, humid weather and strenuous activity. Its moisture-managing underwear is designed for work, travel, exercise, outdoor recreation and everyday life in places where perspiration is not merely possible but practically guaranteed. For more information about SwampButt Underwear or the Scale of Sultry, visit https://swampbutt.com.
